How often do we write a story about something and make up the worst possible conclusion? Someone is late or they don’t call back
right away, someone doesn’t respond in the way that we think they should, or we don’t get the feedback were looking for—and then we make up a story about what that means and how we feel about it. We project our own insecurities and then are afraid to talk about how we feel. The crazy thing is: in the moment we get frustrated and upset; we actually have a physical response in our body, that puts our system on high alert. Toxins are released in the body and biochemically there is a negative cocktail brewing within. Automatically, we feel into this story, and once the mind connects with the negative cocktail, it takes over and we are done. We will find evidence and proof to support our thinking. We will pull in memories, past hurts, and the opinion of others that have nothing to do with it. And this fuels the story. We will not only create the story, we will give life to it and forecast the next six months, including all the ways will get revenge, and we will stay in a pattern of depression, lack, limitation, scarcity, and aloneness—And it’s all made up!
Sometimes we say to another person, “you made me…” as if we were a puppet and that someone else has control over making us do anything. We may give our power away, or we may be so caught up in the drama of things that we think someone made us pissed off, or pushed our buttons so much that it caused us to react in a certain way. We actually say to them, “You made me this way.” Immediately we are thrown into resistance, resentment, and revenge—and the game is back on.
The invitation is to really begin to see how this plays out in our lives as self-sabotage, damaged relationships, and ongoing drama. What if instead of writing a story that made everyone wrong, we decided to pay more attention to how we are feeling and responding. Let us begin to connect with what is going on within our own mind and body. We really do choose moment by moment how we are going to show up, what we will be committed to and how we will respond in any given situation.
When we become the best version of ourselves that we can be, we don’t need to cut people out of our lives or make them responsible for our results. Our opportunity is to focus on our own self-care, the quality of our relationships, our career, and contribution. We get to stand as an example for others—and they will decide to rise up to their own potential or to find another playground of drama. Here’s the deal about growth—not everyone wants to participate. It is not easy to look in the mirror and take 100% responsibility for your life. It is a lifetime commitment, and we have to make a daily commitment to stay on track. Not everyone is ready for that kind of responsibility. It is not your job to attempt to fix others or to even see them as less than or whatever story we could make up about that too. Our job is to stay committed to our own path and to find the people and support that we need for our own growth and expansion.
Proclaim: I will pay attention to the stories I am making up. I will be the witness and just notice where my thinking and BEing is. In moments that I find myself getting disturbed, I will take a few minutes to take a few deep breaths, and I will remember to anchor in my vision. The opportunity is to be the witness and to keep noticing where I am placing my attention. Am I in my head making up worst case sinearo or am I staying on track?